#someday ALL yoi characters will have their own

[sea-goddess-amphitrite]

Yes, hi! I'm sorry, this is just to let you know that your tags for Victor and Yuuri (#the lost legend and #the phoenix) are BRILLIANT. I'm in love with these tags!

yELLS

I’m so glad you like them! tbh I’m just as in love with those tags now as the day i came up with them, and im so so glad someone else is in love with them too!!! (^♡^)

[liesonthefloordramatically]

@desertmint tagged me in a thing so...list of current WIPs.  Since I’m not actively working on anything right now, some of these are Ancient.  Tagging whoever would like to do this thing (and maybe @adventures-in-asexuality if they so desire :3c).

Fics that I will probably work on again at some point (in alphabetical order of their working titles, most of which are things like “I can’t believe this is happening again rip”):

1. Emporio & Irene: post-canon fic that’s just about how trauma is like the world ending and nobody but you noticing :) also Irene & Emporio feels paralleled with Jolyne & Emporio feels because I know what I’m about. little less than 300 words in the doc at the mo

2. Hualian fake dating. look. I’ve written 18k for it, but finished it’s probably gonna wind up being like 50k so. I don’t know what to tell you.

3. secret (secret): okay. I know I’ve been working on this for literal years but I am gonna try not to spoil it. here’s what I can say: if you were one of the two (2) people who liked “I’ll see your face again,” you’ll probably have a mood about it. iterative storytelling. memory as care. the working title is “I’ll tell it right this time, I swear” and it might wind up sticking.

4. JJL fic: JJL is over so it will happen. it will. I swear. (right now it’s just a set of bulletpoints including: “What does it mean to have continuity with people who no longer exist? What does it mean to look in the mirror and recognize yourself but not where you come from?”)

5. Jotaro & Koichi fic: there’s a doc. there are no words in it. but the emotions are in my head.

6. Jotaro & Polnareff fic: there are slightly more words in this doc!!! this might wind up being a linear storytelling is fake fic--we’ll see. basically four-ish scenes spanning from SDC to post-VA.

7. post-SDC Joseph character study except linear time is fake so it’s really just a frickin’ Joseph character study: there are a surprising number of words in this doc for something I haven’t touched in a really long time.

8. Post-lovers Jotakak.  Listen.  I know people want to read this.  I want to read this.  I like the like 1k I’ve written on it. Can I find any of the other words? No.  Anyway, it’s my usual flavor of nonsense (Stand & user relationships, weird intimacy, the mortifying ordeal of being loved and the rewards of being known, etc.)

9. Kakyoin character study.  I haven’t even started a doc for this because if I start a doc then I will have to do something about it instead of just threatening it.

Fics that are so ancient that generations of spiders have lived and died undisturbed in them:

1. Big Gay Kansai Trip: post-canon Everyone Lives AU SDC absurdity that was mostly an excuse to write my hot takes about Kansai tourist sites.  wrote 300 words. haven’t touched it in years.  Unfortunately, I am too canon compliant for this to be easy to write.

2. I started feverishly writing a Aigis/Fem!MC fic upon finishing Persona 3 Portable and then got distracted by Giorno

3. Yukako & Aya fic. listen. they’re just important.

4. Nagoya AU: if I put this in the other category I will actually be tempted to write it. “How much of it do you have planned out, Queenie?” Too much, honestly.  More than I should. Someday I will go insane and write it and then we’ll all be sorry.

5. Turn your back and walk away: SEVERAL WAYS STONE OCEAN COULD HAVE ENDED MUCH WORSE!!!! again, stonewalled by my own canon compliance although there are actually a fair number of words in the doc.

6. YOI fic......rest in pieces....

[littlestarlost]

what happened.

All this hunger is Always following us Out where we survive under poisonous skies They’re dreaming, but nobody’s sleeping Just coked hearts speeding See all the gold teeth gleaming See all the young, healthy free men Just move into nothing

(CW: discussion of mental health, trauma, PTSD)

A version of this post has been sitting in my drafts folder for ten months. I know this, because I originally began to write it around late January, just in time for the one-year mark to have passed since I’d last updated Setting Sun. When I posted that most recent update, I had just turned 30 years old, and I promised that it would not be another year before the next update. I wanted, so badly, for that to be true. In hindsight, it’s honestly better that I failed to keep that promise; I fear it might have exacerbated the damage that’s already been done, and made the healing process that much harder.

It’s been nearly two years. I want to talk about what happened.

I first began to write about Yuuri Katsuki and Victor Nikiforov because I recognized myself so keenly in them; Yuuri’s high-achieving anxiety and imposter syndrome, and Victor’s quietly functional depression. When I found YOI, I was in grad school; I was winning awards, the top of my class, and utterly terrified that it was all a sham. Being able to channel those emotions through these characters helped me realize my own greatness, to embody it and walk with confidence and bravado. It allowed me to go into my post-degree job search with my head held high, trusting that all the lessons I had learned would lead me to professional success. Yuuri and Victor walked through life with me, two shadows of my own psyche, two people who helped me understand myself.

The first few months of the job were fine. Then things became less than fine, and then continued to descend into the kind of mundane nightmare that only multinational corporate legal firms could manifest. Setting Sun, a story about love and self-acceptance and joy, began to twist around in on itself. I don’t want to go into detail, but suffice to say that I spent nearly two years being gaslit and abused, told I was worthless, constantly having panic attacks as I desperately tried to exert control over things that were way over my head. My body betrayed me; I was in so much pain I couldn’t walk, so stressed I couldn’t bring myself to eat unless I’d smoked weed to calm the nausea. I began to believe that I had peaked in grad school, that I was fooling myself, that I was going to be trapped in that cubicle for the rest of my life, doing grunt work without challenge or interest, in the kind of workplace where you get reported to HR for sighing too loudly. That is a thing that actually fucking happened to me; nobody asked why I might be sighing, and nobody stopped by to check in when I spent most days in tears. This was a place where less than half the people in the room put up their hands when asked if they had ever been creative as kids. This was a place where I almost never got to see the sun.

Because I was massively overqualified and even more massively underworked, I spent a lot of 2018 writing fanfic--my zine pieces, my zutara pieces, all sorts of creative things. I also began to write horror AUs; two stories, in particular, gained a fair amount of traction on this particular platform. When I look back now, I see them for the coping mechanisms that they were; in the case of the crossroads AU, where Yuuri is willing to sell his soul to the devil just to escape his commute, it wasn’t even particularly subtle. I poured all my energy into creative pursuits; it’s been my outlet my whole life, and for a while it helped. By the time I hit the SCP-9874 AU, I burned out so profoundly and utterly that it destroyed my relationship to YOI and cauterized the pieces. SCP-9874 was one of the most creative things I’ve ever done, but it also involved what is, in hindsight, a shocking level of violence and horror inflicted on these characters who were such a close part of me. I was doing this to them because I was hurting, all the time. I now recognize it as the cry for help that it was, and to this day I fantasize about taking down all the SCP-9874 posts and excising that portion of my legacy as much as possible.

I wrote Setting Sun’s 21st chapter in honour of my 30th birthday, in late January of 2019. Somehow, at the time, I didn’t realize how rough it was. How much it implied about me and how I was doing. How much it reflected the true extent of the damage I was suffering. I left Victor and Yuuri in an abandoned apartment with more questions than answers and more regrets than they or I had ever thought possible, and I thought, somehow, that this was a good turning point. Little did I know at the time that the worst was still to come.

I was able to finally escape that toxic office last October, when I found a new job that paid nearly double and was everything I wanted to do in life and more. But  Yuri on Ice hurt too much to think about, even as time marched forward and I began to heal. I had PTSD flashbacks to the old office; I dealt with echo upon echo of terror that everything would fall away to reveal I was trapped in the same old nightmare again. In January 2020, I actually took a few days off for my birthday and reread Setting Sun from the beginning, and I’d somehow forgotten how funny it is, how sweet it is, how hopeful. I had completely forgotten; it had been burned away by twenty months of agony. That realization hurt more than all the other ones put together, I think. I had a good long cry over that.

Fast forward to now, and people have started to find Setting Sun again. They’ve found it on and off in the months since I updated, and for a very long time I would read the truly lovely comments people wrote--thanking me for writing it, hoping I’d come back someday, wishing me well wherever I was--and I would dissolve into tears because I just...couldn’t. I couldn’t bear to go back to this story that I could no longer recognize myself in. And nowadays, when new commenters come, I will warn them about that last chapter I wrote, because I can recognize it as the outlier it is.

But something has very recently changed.

I couldn’t necessarily tell you exactly what. Maybe it’s that I passed the one-year mark at my new job, and the last of the poison has finally been excised. Maybe it’s because I’m looking at all my writing with new eyes as I prepare to try doing this for a living. Maybe it’s because it’s 2020, and the rules aren’t really relevant anymore. I don’t know. But I can say that, two weekends ago, I opened Setting Sun, and realized that it didn’t seem impossible anymore. I realized that the boys had been through more than enough. We’ve been through more than enough. We deserve the happy ending I always planned to give them, going back four whole years when I first planned out this massive weird tale.

It’s been a very long time. It’s been exactly long enough.

I can’t promise exactly when the final chapter of Setting Sun will arrive. I’m walking back onto previously thin ice, and my footsteps are more than a little hesitant, so as not to cause any undue cracks. But I can remember the joy and humour and fun again; I can conceive of jokes and silliness and sweetness again. My playlist is filling up again, with songs of hope and love instead of anguish and sorrow. The Yuuri and Victor who sit inside my heart are skating; the music is carrying them, the wind is rushing past their ears, their feet feel light again and they want to jump and take flight and make beautiful things.

I have bookended this post with lyrics from a song that’s been on the maybe list for Setting Sun for nearly as long as Setting Sun has existed. It’s a song I love quite profoundly, a song that means a lot to me personally, but I could never manage to make it fit. It’s a song about running away to the big bright city, about being broken on the world’s wheel, and about realizing you just want to go home. It’s a song that’s ostensibly about the tragedy of this process, but right now I’m sitting at my desk, listening to the line I, I, I wanna go back, back, back, back, with grateful tears running down my face, and I’m realizing that it’s not part of Yuuri’s story, nor Victor’s; it’s part of mine. Home may never be the same as when you left, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t waiting for you with open arms.

So that’s what happened.

Put my body on a wagon And carry me off to the ocean Let me float on into the eastern sun Out where tomorrow has just begun Where I used to be wild, back in my time Now I just fight to sleep at night So render me up into the elements Lay me in a light that I can trust Lay me in a light that I can trust Lay me in a light that I come from...

(Gold Teeth, by Hey Rosetta!)

[japansace]

Underrated Yuri on Ice Fics (Part 2!)

*cracks knuckles* All right, here we go.

People wanted more underrated YOI fic recommendations, so I’m here to provide. Please read these fics if you’re interested and give them some love! (Oh, and feel free to send any fics you think should be added to the list my way. Perhaps I’ll make a part three of this someday.)

You, in Sunlight by pandabomb [ T // 3.5K words // complete ]

Summary: To acquaintances and strangers, Viktor was excellent at hiding his true feelings. Yuuri was beginning to forget what it meant to be a stranger to him.

A soft, quiet snapshot from Yuuri and Viktor's earliest days in St. Petersburg together.

---

Some much needed contextualizing of Yuuri settling into life in St. Petersburg and Victor becoming acclimated to his new role as skater, coach, and fiancé. Just unbearably sweet all around.

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Comfort and Joy by sublime_jumbles [ G // 3.5K words // complete ]

Summary: The Japanese restaurant with the most stars on Yelp doesn't open until eleven, but that's all right. Yuuri is still sleeping soundly then, as Viktor gets up, gets dressed with the silent speed of a quick change, and scrawls a note in hasty English on a slip of hotel stationery.

---

Just some sweet fluff post-episode twelve. Victor wakes before Yuuri and decides to spoil him while they’re still in their hotel in Barcelona. It’s adorable and also has some great pro-chubby Yuuri Katsuki content, so it gets an A from me.

---

Here Comes a Thought by @crossroadswrite [ G // 7K words // complete ]

Summary: Yuuri dreams about his last competition a lot. How could he not when it changed his life so viscerally.

In his dreams, it’s always falling. It’s never hitting the ground, because Yuuri knows what happens when he hits the ground – torn ACL, mild concussion and a nasty bruise on his head that had lasted for weeks. It’s never the pain he’s afraid of in his dreams, Yuuri’s well used to pain.

It’s the act of falling, the promise of pain and failure. It’s what falling means. It haunts Yuuri, even now when the bruise on his head is completely gone and his knee is slowly healing.

(Or: Yuuri struggles with being forced into retirement by an injury, Victor struggles with getting Yuuri to talk about it, and they still love each other through all of it.)

---

This fic made me sob like a little bitch.

Yeah. It’s just that good.

It’s so heart-wrenching but so them. It hurts in all the best ways. And it’s also the reason I can’t ever go to an aquarium again without feeling just a bit morose.

---

A Place for You and Me by whatsup_buttercup [ E // 5K words // complete ]

Summary: “Be careful in the hallway,” Viktor says. “I had to move the bookshelf out of the bedroom.”

A famous interior decorator from a magazine placed that bookshelf there two years ago. Yuuri remembers the glossy spread about Viktor Nikiforov’s modern apartment very well. It’s still in a protective plastic cover in his parent’s attic. “Why?”

“I bought something new,” Viktor says, cryptic.

---

Omegaverse! Yuuri’s stubborn pride rears its ugly head here, and it feels so in-character. Poor Victor is just trying his best--but when they fail, they fail together.

---

Hopeless, Breathless, Baby Can’t You See? by xylophones [ G // 15.5K words // complete ]

Summary: The weekend of last year’s Rostelecom cup, Yuuri Katsuki declared his love for fried pork in a press conference, got caught by paparazzi rescuing a dog from a river, revealed a short program costume that showed off his multitude of soulmate marks, and broke Viktor’s world record. All while being, objectively, the cutest human being on the planet.

The entire skating world–– including Viktor–– fell in love instantly.

Or: a soulmate au where the first time you touch your soulmate(s), colored marks appear on your skin. Yuuri has more marks than Viktor’s ever seen on someone. Viktor has none.

--

This is one of my new favorite YOI fics--if not my absolute favorite. I’m a sucker for a good soulmate AU, and this is one of the best: feel-sy, subversive, and stunningly gorgeous. Please read this one! You won’t regret it.

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Tangerine Trees, Marmalade Skies by @ebenroot [ T // 6.5K words // complete ]

Summary: It’s not that Yuri thinks Victor is a big fat liar. It just, well, Yuri thinks Victor is a big fucking liar.

“The Sun,” Yuri repeats for the fifth time that day. “You’re engaged to the Sun.”

Or: a (slightly confusing and annoyingly sappy) account of Victor Nikiforov's engagement to the Sun, as narrated by #1 employee Yuri Plisetsky

---

I’ve reread this one... a shameful amount of times. It’s pure fluff, plain and simple, with a sprinkle of casual magic that feels like a hug. 10/10, would recommend.

---

Memento Amare by @belovedyuuri [ G // 5K words // complete ]

Summary: Parting ways has never been in their plans, not even for just a moment; it's no surprise Yuuri and Victor have a terrible time saying goodbye, even if for just several weeks. When longing hits hard, memories sweeten it right up.

(You've heard about History Makers. Now prepare for Memory Makers. In which Yuuri and Victor share their life and love with each other even when they're not physically together.)

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Just some good ol’ fashioned feels about Yuuri and Victor, doing the hard work of trying to make their relationship work after their whirlwind romance. It’s absolutely gorgeous and wholesome all around.

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Tongue Tied by @stammiviktor [ T // 2.5K words // complete ]

Summary: The silver-haired man in front of Yuuri in line is the only good thing to come of the situation.

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Another new fic that has rocketed up the list of my absolute favorites. Yuuri and Victor pretending to be married to get airport preferential treatment--while at the same time not sharing a common language between them--had me positively rolling with laughter. Perfect, fabulous, a thousand chef’s kisses. I want ten movies and a TV series.

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Work of Art by Athra (getaway_machine) [ E // 2.5K words // complete ]

Summary: Victor admires the work of art that is his beautiful husband.

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Some lovely smut, shibari edition! It’s feels very them, while still being hot as hell. Read for a good time.

Something Borrowed, Something Blue, A Thousand Times I’d Marry You by @ewokthrowdown [ T // 2.5K // complete ]

Summary: What’s more, Yuuri’s got fantastic honeymoon ideas. While Victor’s planning the wedding, Yuuri’s casually asks the fiancés where they’re going, then always has a hundred ideas for romantic things to do once they’re there. A cute bakery that does heart shaped macarons, the best spot for stargazing, which bar has swing dance. Victor had asked Yuuri how he knew all these lovely things to do, and Yuuri, blushing furiously, had told him that these were all the things he planned to do with Victor but either hadn’t had time to while they themselves visited, or they hadn’t been to that particular location yet. The fact that Yuuri has dates planned for them in pretty much every romantic spot on the planet, had Victor swooning in a calculated way that meant Yuuri had to catch him.

[Future fic in which Victor quits skating to be Yuuri's Katsuki-Nikiforov's trophy husband and a wedding planner.]

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And let’s end with another sweet one! 

This one is sooooooo cute! Victor becomes a wedding planner after he retires, and the fic shows us little snapshots of him and Yuuri traveling all over the world to make people’s dreams come true. They’re just in love, love, love, and I’m always 100% here for it.

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All right, let’s wrap it up here. Thank you for reading this post! Please check out these fics and their writers if they happen to catch your eye--and my inbox is always open for more suggestions! And before I go, let me just leave my own fics here in case you’d like to look into my credentials~

[kalira]

What's a character or ship you haven't written for that you really want to?

That is an excellent question! It took me a while to think on, because honestly *gestures at my AO3 profile* I tend to whimsically or impulsively go for writing just about anything I feel like. ^^;

There is a very tiny, obscure, insane oneshot manga I have plans to write a fic for (basically as soon as I have time, because I’m quite busy right now). . .

I’d like to write KibaInoSaku, but have yet to give them a shot! (Actually there’s a few Naruto trios or more ships I’d like to write but haven’t gotten around to or sorted out a solid plan for (or simply had time) yet. . . Added a couple new ones to that number recently as well.)

I also rather want to try writing Toph/Sokka/Suki . . . and Bato/Hakoda/Kya (as more than background) over in ATLA.

The Girl Genius OT3! Which I love and . . . I suppose I have written them, during the Three Sentence Ficathon, but I always forget that. (Tiny thing!) They’re in a rather tricky world and complex themselves, but I do want to try.

Mizuki (from Kamisama Kiss) so desperately needs a Proper Dom and I kind of want to write that. . . With someone. (Tomoe would be good at it and perhaps manage teaching Nanami how to handle it, together. . .)

I also so badly need for Director Choi (Personal Taste) to get a nice boyfriend of his own. I would have to create an OC for the purpose, but. . .

Spike/Xander (BtVS) was the very first ship (and fanfiction at all) I ever read, and I feel like I need to at least write and post one myself for that reason. . . (I think I have a couple rough starts at things that didn’t work out in my files from many years ago?)

There’s definitely more I have WIPs or notes or attempts at thus far that haven’t gone anywhere, in a range of fandoms - maybe someday soon!

(Included in that number are things like Inoichi/Shikaku, Kakashi/Deidara, (Naruto) - Arthur/Eames (Inception) - Otabek/Yuri (YOI) - Marcone/Dresden (Dresden Files) - and honestly tons more I’m sure.)

. . .I hope you don’t regret asking me the question, as I’ve quite the answer here! ^^;

~Kalira

[yuuri-katsuki-is-a-bottom]

YOI AU where everything is the same except Victor and Yuuri are so destined to be together that they spontaneously and single handedly spawn soulmates into existence. The universe or god or fate or all of the above sees these two losers find each other in nearly every possible version of reality and says “damn, they gotta hook up here too” and goes all out to make it happen. Victor and Yuuri both have multiple soulmate signifiers, but since soulmates didn’t exist until Victor (and later, Yuuri) was born, they have no idea what any of it means.

Victor is born colorblind with a small birthmark shaped like half a snowflake on his hip and the phrase “Be my coach Victor” scrawled along the inside of his thigh in shaky Japanese characters. His parents don’t recognize it as writing, and resolve to ignore their son’s weird birthmarks. They never even consider that it might be saying something. Victor, when he’s old enough to wonder and has a few years of international experience under his belt, copies down the characters as best he can and decides to get it translated the next time he’s in Japan. When he finds out his birthmark is actually a demand for coaching that identifies him by name, he’s very confused, and wonders if maybe his parents had it tattooed onto him when he was a baby? Perhaps they were drunk? They’re not around to ask anymore, of course, but that’s the only explanation he can think of. Surely this mark isn’t natural. Eventually, he chalks it up to yet another thing he’ll never know about his family, and does his best to put it out of his mind. Some days, though--his worst days--he can’t help absently rubbing the mark on his thigh. Whenever he does, he gets an odd, phantom weight deep within his chest. It feels like happiness and light and hope and everything beautiful and pure in the world. Later, when hope and happiness is sorely lacking in Victor’s life, that phantom weight is sometimes all that gets him through the day.

Yuuri is also born colorblind with a snowflake and words on his body, but that’s where the similarities end. Where Victor’s half snowflake is tiny and almost unnoticeable even against his pale skin, Yuuri’s takes up the entirety of his back. It’s loud and in your face and Yuuri spends most of his life trying to avoid situations where anybody might see it. His words, written in elegant Cyrillic, loop around his right wrist and trail up his arm. Unlike Victor’s parents, Yuuri’s are very curious and concerned about the strange markings on their newborn son. They also recognize the writing as letters, though they don’t quite fit the English letters they learned in school and mostly kept up with in case of any international tourists. They don’t have many resources, but eventually they find out it’s in Russian and get it translated. The words “A commemorative photo Sure” make absolutely no sense to them, and they begin to fear for their son. They never quite get over the way that mark in particular bothers them, and it’s something young Yuuri picks up on. Unconsciously, he tries his best to hide his words as best he can as well, and never mention them around his parents. When he gets older and discovers Victor and spends his tween years going through a Russia obsession phase, he notes the similarities between the flowing script on his wrist and the strange, almost-English-but-not-quite letters that adorn all the original versions of Victor’s posters and other assorted merchandise and marketing. He’s too scared to try and translate them, but he holds onto them tightly as a talisman that, maybe, this means he’ll meet Victor someday (which incidentally means he’s the first person in the world to come close to figuring out what soulmate marks are) and, for the first time in his life, he isn’t ashamed of them. He finds himself touching the words often, even if he’s sometimes brought to tears by a sense of deep, nearly soul crushing loneliness when he does. It’s a feeling he’s familiar with, but it’s also foreign, and sometimes when he’s having a particularly bad anxiety attack, focusing on a feeling that doesn’t feel like his own is enough to calm him down faster than he would be able to manage alone.

The first time Yuuri and Victor’s eyes meet isn’t the first time they speak, and the first time they speak (”A commemorative photo? Sure.”) isn’t the first time they both speak to each other (Be my coach, Victor!”), thereby thwarting, in one meeting, pretty much the entire point of every single one of their soulmate signifiers. Still, their destiny is to be together and nothing, not even the boys themselves, can stand in the way of that. Later on, when a drunk Yuuri stumbles up to Victor and looks him in the eyes, the world explodes with color for the first time. Victor is so surprised he almost misses the slurred words spilling from Yuuri’s mouth. Almost. He spends the rest of the night in awe of the sexy, drunken nymph who literally brought light into his world. He’s also, for the first time in his life (or at least since he was so young he can no longer remember) feels those phantom feelings without touching his words at all, though this time they finally feel natural, like they’re actually his. He’s not sure what it all means, but he’s not a stupid man. He knows it means something. And now that he’s found Yuuri, he never wants to let him go. When Yuuri disappears after the banquet, he’s devastated, and over the next few weeks the only thing that keeps him from falling into despair is touching his words. They still fill him with phantoms of happiness and light and hope, but they’re also a physical reminder that he’s supposed to meet Yuuri. That he was always supposed to meet Yuuri, even before the other man was born, which is slightly scary but even more reassuring. Yuuri is meant to be in his life. He refuses to believe he was born with these marks and made to live nearly three decades seeing the world in shades of grey just to have one drunken night dancing with his Yuuri. (Incidentally, this makes Victor the second person to come close to figuring out what soulmarks mean, though he’s much closer to the truth than Yuuri)

Yuuri, on the other hand, wakes up in his underwear in his hotel room and has absolutely no idea why he can suddenly see color. Eventually, once he’s done throwing up from a mix of sixteen glasses of champagne and suddenly seeing every color in the world after just over two decades of half-thinking colors were something people made up to mess with him, he decides that he must have smacked his head on something during his bender. It’s the only explanation that makes sense. Despite his shame at his FS, his grief over Vicchan, and his embarrassment at the thought that someone might have seen him before he managed to get back to his room and pass out, he can’t help spending his entire trip home scrolling through Victor’s Instagram and re-watching every Victor video he can find. Experiencing them in full living color is almost like discovering Victor for the first time all over again and, at least until he gets home and is once again reminded of Vicchan and his failure in Sochi, his entire body feels like it’s made of joy and wonder.

After Victor shows back up in Yuuri’s life, he very quickly makes the last connection: Yuuri has a snowflake that matches his perfectly, aside from the size, and those words on Yuuri’s wrist strike a chord and he remembers (with a small twinge of shame that he didn’t recognize this beautiful man in front of him as the skater whose musicality and step sequences had begun to waken corners of Victor’s soul he thought long since buried and gone as he watched his SP in Sochi) that those are the very first words he’d even spoken to Yuuri. He’s even more certain now that this means Yuuri is meant to be with him. Literally every single great mystery of his birth has the same answer: Yuuri. He has no idea why Yuuri refuses to mention the banquet, and he has a few moments of panic when he thinks, marks or no marks, Yuuri will never want him in the ways he’s coming to realize he needs Yuuri, but every time that happens Yuuri will say ( “I want you to stay who you are, Viktor!” ) or do (pulling him close, demanding his attention) something to renew and reaffirm Victor’s hope and conviction.

Yuuri, for his part, never actually sees any of Victor’s marks until after they kiss in China, mostly because he spends every second where Victor’s hips and thighs are exposed desperately trying not to look at those very areas, lest he explode (in every possible connotation of the word). Once he gives himself permission to look, he’s utterly floored. Victor shares his birthmark? And those words on his thigh written in what almost looks like his sloppy handwriting when he’s nervous or drunk... Be my coach, Victor. Did this mean that Victor had always wanted to be a coach? So much that he had the request tattooed into his skin? Or was this something he’d had since birth, like the Cyrillic on Yuuri’s wrist? (He still can’t bring himself to translate those words, now more than ever. What if they say that Victor hates him? What if they tell him to let him go? He can’t deal with that; with knowing they have real meaning to his life while also telling him to get rid of the one person who had always given his life meaning. Ironic, considering how close Yuuri almost comes to doing that very thing on his own anyway)

Once the’re finally together, and engaged (with rings that match their snowflakes, no less), and all misunderstandings are cleared up and they’re both looking forward to their future as skater and coach-and-skater and husband and husband (after he wins Victor his gold medal, of course, and oh how Victor will come to regret that particular bit of word vomit in the months to come), they finally talk about the marks. Victor shares what his meant to him over the years, and Yuuri does the same. Yuuri tells him that, even though he doesn’t remember asking, the feelings Victor describes when he touches Yuuri’s request on his skin sounds an awful lot like the way Victor’s skating had always made Yuuri feel mixed with how Yuuri feels when he’s drunk. Victor, in turn, opens up about the loneliness and isolation that were ingrained in his daily life when he so thoughtlessly offered Yuuri a photo with his empty smile. They come to the conclusion that, embedded within each of their words, are also the feelings that the other person was experiencing while saying them (when they said them, when they would say them). They also come to the conclusion that this means they were always meant to be together, that their shared marks and colorblindness was given to them so that they’d know when they finally met their other half. (Incidentally, this means that they both are the first people in the world to discover what soulmarks mean, though only a very select few will ever learn this and even fewer will believe it)

As they reaffirm their love for each other, the universe or god or fate or whatever looks on and thinks “this actually worked out pretty well for a beta test. With a bit of tweaking, I wonder what would happen if we did a full roll out?”

And so, on the day after Yuuri Katsuki and Victor Nikiforov discover soulmates together, the entire population of the world wake up either colorblind, with one half of a complete mark, or with the first words someone out there will ever speak to them somewhere on their body (along with a few other variations that get patched in later for variety), all of them completely unaware that the love between two silly male figure skaters was transcendent enough to will the entire concept of soulmates into existence.

[storytell]

@praevari​ asked

every other one starting with ✮ !

✮ ━ top three favorite muses that you’ve played

twain, gentle, and maria for sure. twain muse.. well, he’ll always be my favorite. gentle muse is up there because while i may not have as much muse for him as i used to, i vividly remember the days when i would do literally nothing but scream about him constantly. maria may be new, but she’s so fun to write and so amazing and just perfect in every way.

ღ ━ favorite canon ships for your muse(s). are there any you dislike?

pretty much all of the baccano! canon ships that involve my muses are really spicy, as well as the MDZS canon ships (wangxian and xuanli) and darling/apple. as for canon ships i DON���T like, these are the ones i can think of just by scanning through my muses pages: gentle and la brava, shiroe and akatsuki, lizzie and daring, kagami and adrien, and tink and terrence.

☀ ━ how long have you been roleplaying? how did you get into it?

probably like 6-8 years! i got into roleplaying via minecraft. the minecraft creative server i’d always play on was big on roleplaying, and i always liked to join other roleplay plots or create my own on there. i didn’t start tumblr until like.. 2 and a half years ago now?

♕ ━ which fictional characters are your favorites?

i have a lot, so i’ll give one top favorite from every fandom i roleplay in! twain (bsd), genji (overwatch), yo fujiura (the unlimited), gentle (bnha), roland (vanitas no carte), all of love (servamp), seung-gil (YOI!!!), shiroe (lh), koumei (magi), wei wuxian (mdzs), KAITO (vocaloid), jack frost (rotg), monika (ddlc), yura (pafl), maddie (ever after high), tamaki (ohshc), juleka (miraculous), wells (poe party), sylvia (alice isn’t dead), claire (baccano!), cassandra (tts), terushima (haikyuu!!), liz (ahs: hotel), gatsby (the great gatsby), giovanni (epithet erased), silvermist (disney fairies), gear/adam moonlit (evillious)

◈  ━ share some headcanons that you have for a muse of your choosing

let’s go with shiroe! 

he didn’t realize he was gay until he met naotsugu

he used to really love tea, but now he’s sort of tired of it. he won’t say no if it’s offered to him.

he doesn’t really want to go back and finish his education in the real world.

he’d like to have kids someday, but worries he’d be a bad parent.

because he likes working so much, he doesn’t know when to take a break and is prone to passing out in the middle of his work.

☾ ━ how many pets do you own? if none, what kind of animals do you like?

i own three dogs and a cat who is actually my dad’s and i haven’t seen in several years. i would LIKE to have a chameleon. my mom said she’d get me one when i move out.

mun related.     /     accepting.

[catradorazine]

Hi, folks! We’re back and happy to announce your new Mod Team for the Catradora Zine! In case you’re wondering, the Catradora Zine is a project dedicated to the characters Catra and Adora, from the 2018 She-Ra Reboot, and their complex relationship with one another. Check below for info on our Mods, along with links to even more information!

Fonda

https://easyminds.tumblr.com || https://twitter.com/easyminds

Hello there, my name is Fonda. I’ve been apart of the SPOP fandom since the reboot aired but fondly remember the 1985 cartoon as luckily, I “retro” TV channels were a thing. I was the solo mod for the Fairy Tail Nakama, and I am currently planning a Allurance fanzine to launch in 2019. I was an artist on 4 other fanzines within the following fandoms; Miraculous Ladybug, Naruto, and Fairy Tail.

The reason I like Catra and Adora, as friends, enemies and as a romantic pair is because they as stand alone characters are not just defined by one another, but they both at the same time have had a huge impact on one another throughout season 1, especially Catra.

Maya 

https://lordzarcock.tumblr.com || https://twitter.com/lordzarcock

Hi, I’m Maya! I’ve been involved in many aspects of fandom events since 2016, and I love helping out in the community. I used to be mainly involved in the VLD and PJO fandom, but have since branched out to TDP and SPOP. I can usually be found working on spreadsheets or handling emails, with a color-coding system of course! I love organization and am a bit obsessed with maximizing everything.

I love Catra and Adora’s relationship because it’s so complex. It’s not perfect by any means, but the way they interact and think about their past make it apparent that they care for each other, even if it is confusing with how it is now as they grow as individuals. The relationship is twisted and tangled due to many factors, but I hope that things will get better in some way. They’ve loved each other as friends before, and I hope that they still love each other enough to come to a mutual understanding of their relationship, whatever that may be.

Fricz

http://fricz-art.tumblr.com/ || https://twitter.com/FriczArt

Hello! My name is Noah or Fricz, I’m currently in a lot of fandoms being some of them YoI, VLD, Banana Fish and of course SPOP! I’m an animator and illustrator and my biggest dream ever is to become a concept artist and storyboard artist; I have previous experience being mod (particularly of Voltron zines) so I wish to bring my experience to this zine and learn a lot more.

I deeply enjoy Adora and Catra’s relationship because it feels real for me, it’s a friendship you can easily find in real life, making it easy to understand their personalities, I like how it portraits how it feels to grow up and how unavoidably friendship will change with it and how said friendship can overcome the change or how it’ll break. So yes, I like the complexity involving these girls and their relationship.

AD

https://twitter.com/gesuko__

Hi! My name is Gesuko or AD. I was really excited for the SPOP reboot, and it delivered! I fell in love with the characters and their relationships with each other. This is my first time acting as a mod for a zine, but I’ve been an artist on 10+ other fanzines in the Voltron and Boku no Hero Academia fandoms, and many more on going projects. I currently work in animation, and fandom has really motivated me to work towards making my own show or comic someday.

I love Catra and Adora’s relationship because they have such a complicated history, and even though their sides conflict, they still care about each other deeply. What they do has profound effect on the other, but they’re both separate individuals with their own goals and motivations.

Shanimal

https://felicitywild.tumblr.com/

Hey, I’m Shanimal! I’ve dipped my toes in many a fandom, but magical fantasy has always been one if my favorite genres. Right now She-Ra and The Adventure Zone are at the top of my list, with shows like Voltron: Legendary Defender and Steven Universe close behind. Most of my involvement in fandom is as a fanfic writer, but I’m also currently a mod for two Voltron zines: If You Need Me: A VLD Whump zine, and the Voltron Yearbook.

Catra and Adora are one of my favorite dynamics in the show. As childhood friends turned adversaries, their relationship is wonderfully layered and complex, and I can’t wait to see how it plays out in future seasons!

The following Mods will be tag-teaming the role of Formatting Mod:

Saleha (Main): our Support Mod (see below) 

 Syn (Support): our Social Media Mod (see below)

syn

http://tiramiszu.tumblr.com/ || http://twitter.com/tiramirs/

( ´ ▽ ` )ﾉ Hi there! It’s nice to meet you. I go by syn. I’m a fan artist & hobbyist who’s recently gotten into zines! I have been a zine contributor in the past, and, most recently, have also organized my own small-scale zine. I’m excited to have been brought on as a moderator for the Catradora zine & look forward to bringing my best to this project & the fandom.

Catra and Adora’s relationship is the main feature that really draws me to the She-Ra series, and I’m definitely glad for it. They’re both such a defining presence in each other’s lives, finding it impossible to hate, but impossible to love one another, no matter which side of the war they’ve found each other on. There’s definitely no easy way out for the two of them, but I’m certainly rooting for them.

FateReplay

https://twitter.com/FateReplay/

Hey there~ I’m Saleha, or FateReplay, and I’m a writer and creative works enthusiast. I love graphic design, layout, and organizing things! I’m currently the main mod for a FFXV Promptis zine (Insomnia High). I have a degree in English with a concentration in Creative Writing. I’m in a million fandoms and never have quite enough time for all of them.

She-Ra is a very nostalgic show for me. I love the reboot and the new twist it places on the characters and their relationships. For Catra and Adora specifically, to me their bond is something stronger than friendship but perhaps hard to define. They’ve experienced the worst and the best together, and now the state of the world is placing them on opposite ends of a war. I think they’re dynamic is complex, exciting, and worth exploring. The energy they have together is unlike any other!

★ Twitter ★ FAQ ★ Ask ★ Schedule ★ Mod Page ★

[adrianners]

30 days of YoI: Day 28

28. Your most wanted Yuri on Ice merch

(It took me a while to get used to this new background, but maaaaaan, once I realized how much more it says about his character, I was sold. The kitchen was just copying the apartment photo; for this, somebody sat down to think about what Viktor would actually own, and their conclusion was “a hugeass library.”)

I want books! Specifically, the sheet music books! I always say I gained my good sightreading skills through ritual sacrifice of any semblance of ear training abilities (no lie, 8 a.m. theory & ear training class for all four years is what made me choose English over piano performance), which means I can’t begin to figure this stuff out on my own like some people have. Thanks to some very reasonable used copies on Amazon, I get to cross off Go Yuri Go and Yuri on Life from the ol’ bucket list in a couple weeks. Maybe someday the setting and genga books will be similarly dirt cheap used, but I’m not holding my breath.

Pie in the sky: I want the Japanese BluRay box set with the WTTM comic. That one’s probably never happening unless somebody unloads a used set and either doesn't know what they have or doesn't care about getting their money back. But I wannit.

[ice-daddy-vitya]

To mun, what made you connect with Viktor, and how have you made him your own through your blog?

I answered this once a long time ago… and I’ll be honest, it’s going to be difficult to answer now. Originally, my passion for both YOI and Viktor when I first began this blog was at an all time high. I was excited for a story I could connect to, with real characters facing real issues… The fandom was still new, everything was still exciting, and my living situation irl was a lot more… comfortable… than it is now. Since then, a lot has changed for me, both within the fandom and without.

Over time, my connection to Viktor has changed. At first it was solely based on him being my favorite character, then it evolved to him being the muse that got me back into writing meaningful and detailed stories. And honestly, my connection to him is ever changing. It changes based on how I’m writing him or who I’m writing with - and it helps to have writing partners who you connect with well, including their muses - and I personally feel that’s what helps the most when trying to find a character you feel the most comfortable writing as. And this goes for any fandom you’re in.

Initially, with Viktor, it was easy. He was everything I wanted to be. Beautiful, charismatic, rich, successful - while still human enough to have very visible flaws and mortality, and the love and support of those around him that weren’t family by blood. I could relate to him; depressed, lonely, confused about my future and my career, unsure if folk liked me because of me, or because of what I could provide for them. I found myself - my dream self - in Viktor, and allowed myself to get lost in the kind of life I could only dream of living.

It’s been a very long time since I actively and seriously wrote fanfic, or detailed long-term roleplays with Viktor. Perhaps, now with the movie news starting to come through, I can rediscover my passion for Viktor and YOI as a whole. I’m hoping that this terrible mental rut I’ve been in blows over soon.

I suppose that makes me a lot like Viktor right now. Stuck, feeling as though I’m at a terrible impasse, and unsure of where things are going to go from here…

Maybe some cutie will swoop in on a pole during a banquet and change my life for the better someday? Who knows?

[ourlazykittycollection]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Characters: Katsuki Yuuri Additional Tags: yoi space week, nebulae, nonhuman beings Summary:

Day 1 of YOI Space week: Nebulae prompt

Someday, when all of his roots have been nurtured and freed, he will leave Garden behind and float out into the unknown. As long as Yuuri can remember, he’s been dreaming of what could be out there swirling amidst the unborn stars.

[rmnitb]

2017 Fic in Review

I was tagged by @roseandradio and @soulsborne123 - thank you so much!!

To people who still don’t know, I’m Meepyonnee on ffnet! I also made an ao3 account that I honestly only use for kudos and keeping track of my fave yoi and hq fics

Total number of stories (completed/WIPs): 

4 oneshots (SPR’s self-proclaimed daddy; Implore the Dawn, Dance in the Dark; Yearly Mark; and don’t fall to ur death)

17 WIPs (not even gonna say any of the titles yet bc they’re all trash) (……..okay, here’s one: Clockwork Re-destruction)

4 updates for my ongoing stories (Phantasmagoria, Distractions, the piano au and the rotc au i abandoned lmao) 

3 original stories (Tears of Joy, Manang, and [K]) ((hit me up if you want to read them! they’re all speculative fiction ;) ;) ))

grand total: 28

Total word count (not counting WIPs):  22,942

Fandoms written in: Ghost Hunt and Yuri on Ice Looking back, did you write more fic than you thought you would this year, less, or about what you’d expected? Uhhhh,,,, yes it'vs more than I expected???? I was so surprised to see that I’ve written a lot considering I’ve taken up more subjects this semester + I joined the writers club in my uni so I wrote more originals than fics. And for someone who writes vignettes, 22k is seriously amazing What’s your own favorite story of the year? [K]. It’s the first original story I took seriously and so many people from writers club helped with my revision! I really think I’ve improved a lot because of this one story.

Did you take any writing risks this year? I applied for my uni’s writers club lol. That was a risk I didn’t think about at first… If I hadn’t gotten in, I think it would have take a huge chunk out of my self-esteem –> I wouldn’t have written for a long time Do you have any fanfic or profit goals for the new year? I gotta freakin finish my ongoing stories before starting others dammit. I also need write more and work on my shitty narrative style and description Best story of the year? Um. None. They’re all terrible. Most popular story of the year? I think it would be count, cadence, count lololol. If I had continued that, it would have blown up into a bigger thing!  Story of mine most under-appreciated by the universe, in my opinion: Implore the Dawn, Dance in the Dark ;-; I guess fire emblem doesn’t mix well with the gh fandom? Ahh, but I still plan to continue it though Most fun story to write: yas yas yasu lololol (i disappointed someone with that tho) (im still so very sorry for this) Story with the single sexiest moment: I haven’t written it!! huehuehuehehe that scene will be in Distractions soon! Most sweet story: I, as a writer, am incapable of comprehending what “sweet” is, so let’s go with bittersweet: Tears of Joy ”Holy crap, that’s wrong, even for you!” story: The piano au. Because goddamit it should���ve been a violin au so I wouldn’t be in this gigantic writer’s block since i hAVE NO IDEA HOW TO PLAY A PIANO Story that shifted my own perceptions of the characters & most unintentionally telling story: Phantasmagoria. Y'all will know why someday, but uuugh Naru’s so hard to write in this story  Hardest story to write: [K], because before my revision, I was hit with so many criticisms from my fellow WC members and I pressured myself into really improving the piece since I didn’t want to disappoint them—– the one comment I will never forget: “I mean, the story isn’t spectacular, nor is it horrible. It was just k” (tanginaaaaaaa) Biggest disappointment: myself Biggest surprise: I’m writing chapter 6 of Phantasmagoria rn lolol Tagging: Coriana!! @roseandradio 

[discoursecatharsis]

I was curious about your thoughts on this. I’ve always wanted to cosplay but am really self conscious about having the cosplay be accurate. It probably is just some of my own internalized racism taking but I alway feel like I can never cosplay as the characters I like because I have brown skin. I always feel like I have to end up making some sort of au version of them for it to work... idk..

Short answer: go out there and cosplay!

Long answer: you can cosplay whoever you want! No “au version” needed. It doesn’t matter if you’re a different race or different gender or different height from the character, if you wanna cosplay them, do it! Don’t let anything stop you. 

Think of cosplaying like Halloween. If you’re dressed up as fictional characters for Halloween, surely you’ve dressed up as characters who have a different skin color than you. Just think of cosplaying like a Halloween party that’s not in October lol. 

That’s how I got over my initial nerves about cosplaying. I was like, “hmm I’ve already ‘cosplayed’ Violet from the Incredibles, and Timmy Turner from Fairly Oddparents, and Rue from The Hunger Games at Halloween parties... I can do the same at cons too,” so I did. 

I have brown skin too, and I’ve cosplayed some light-skinned characters. 

My first official cosplay at a con was Dawn from Pokemon. 

I really enjoyed this cosplay! I had fun putting pieces together and making her hat. And I’ll never forget the moment where I was like “okay, I love cosplaying” because while walking around, this girl holding a Pikachu plushie looked at me, then smiled and waved like she recognized Dawn and I waved back and it made my whole day tbh. I may not have the same skin color as Dawn, but this little kid still recognized the character and that’s all that matters.

Besides Dawn, I’ve cosplayed a variety of characters: Gou from Free!, a few characters from Attack on Titan (Sasha, Hange, and Ymir), Sara from yoi (my icon), and Moana. And every time has been a really wonderful experience. 

In the future, I wanna cosplay Yachi from Haikyuu!!, and Taiga from Toradora, and Mirai from Beyond the Boundary (and so many more that I haven’t done yet because I’m lazy). All of which are characters who don’t have brown skin, but that doesn’t matter! They’re my favorite characters and I wanna cosplay them, so someday I will~

Seriously, no matter the quality of your cosplay... cosplaying is really fun! Take my word for it. It doesn’t happen often, but when someone asks to take a photo of/with me, I’m dying from happiness on the inside lol.Some cons will even have meetups so you can go take pics with other cosplayers from your fandom. And even just individual cosplayers are so nice and fun. I remember when I was Sasha once, I crossed paths with a Levi cosplayer and we made eye-contact and he nodded at me and said “cadet” and did the salute to me and I’ll never forget that moment hahaha xD

tl;dr: Cosplay whatever characters you want! 

[xianpy49]

Letter From Yuusaku Sato to Ama-dan Member

Ishi-chan Thank you for taking Care of Performance as a leader of Ama to Danshi. it’s was fun to spend time discussing things like stupid thing. After all, there many people that feel Ishi-chan is an entertainer. Please take cafe of All Carefully, and Please proceed with confidence as a leader of Ama to Danshi.

Kami-kun I thought that i won’t never become closer friend, but I think it’s Kami-kun who let’s me learn to stop judge people with the first Impression (LOL). I want you to work hard as an actor, and I’m Happy if Someday we can meet on the same satge.

Tomoya For the first time I met you, until I formed 3illfy, I didn’t have much communication. However, since we startes as ally, we spent time together. I found a lot of wonderful part as a person, cooperativeness of Tomoya, the gentle who not letting people feel disgust, and have a power to read the situation. Someday, I would like you to keep trying not to give up event if you hit a wall. I want to see Tomoya as a voice actor, because he have a character in his voice, I quietly expect it Good.

Yoshiki

From the time of the Contest you got your best ! your weapon, communication skill to be able to get along with people. as the same Hokkaido people, persistently persist until the death ! If you’re Positive, you can make it from negative to positive side. Yoshiki is the Strongest. Beliefs who do not break and believe no to give up, since they’re absolutely Strong. Never go back to Hokkaido (LOL) let’s talk about this time in Tokyo, as a Celebrity, event if yoy become a Granpa !

Kazuma

the time i become Ama-dan member and didn’t know what i was doing, i knew the kind of people beings i was passionate and so amazing, event with a little and playfulness, physical ability high, i trusted as a reliable fellow of talented Kazuma very much.

Im looking forward to a day when I can co-star in the same Stage and Drama someday !

Yamapii when I was a Ama-dan contest, i still remember that it was the first place in the net voting and i was performing a high quality of sword fighting. Maki is a very interesting character as a talent who has a tough stance, but has a leadership that can put everyone together properly.

Ka-kun

at the time of photographing advertisement material, I still remember Ka-kun appeared for the first time in a strange look. I esteem the strong sense of justice and compassionate than anyone was formed from experience and hardship of Ka-kun’s life. indeed the possibilities spread infinitely Ka-kun is really looking forward to my own affection.

Asshi I feel the edge of something with what I played in event before the Ama to danshi. The face is a top-class beauty all over the country. the level of Singing and Dancing are Woow ! Please continue to be more fascinated with that condition.

Ori-chan I was glad when heard that you joined Ama-dan wanting to be Yuusaku(Me). I also have opportunities to speak privately with Ra-chan, and I have consultation and I personally like Hi-chan’s humanity, personality, and voice very much. So don’t hesitate to ask me again if you feel somting worried or stumbled. I use Alice’s makeup pouch from Ray-chan (LOL)

Ryo-kun As long as you smile, yo like a puppy who want to wear a collar, but I Love Ryo-kun’s Smiley face. I think that smile is the strongest weapon, not only to customers but also to everyone as well. I thiks taht I will surely support a lot of custumers heart with that smile, so I’m hoping for smile of Ryo-kun

Aki-chan

When I did with Aki-chan shooting partner together I understood that Aki-chan was Loved by many Customers in many different class. There’re many place to learn from feeling for Aki-chan’s customers. Since I think that I’ll surely be together somewhere whit Aki-chan who Also active in many direction, I would Appreciate it.

For the blog : Here

[tottwritesfanfic]

I was tagged by @humandisasterbuckybarnes (I totally didn’t even notice at first because I’ve been away from Tumblr, sorrryyyy!)

1. How did you come up with your username and what does it mean?

OOH. Well. This actually goes back a long way! The ‘tott’ part of TottWriter is really an acronym for the title of a series of fantasy novels I started writing in my teens. (They’ve undergone a lot of revisions since then.) I picked TotTWriter as a username when I joined a forum in 2006 because it summed up how I saw myself at that time, and it just sorta...stuck. As for what the acronym actually is? Gotta wait and see. 

2. Which fanfic of yours has the most feedback? (bookmarks/subscriptions/hits/kudos).

Ohgosh. Well, I think that one’s gotta be my Digimon fic Hope’s Fire, on pretty much all fronts. It’s my oldest, longest fic, and it’s posted on both Ao3 and ff, so it’s had plenty of time to accrue attention. 

3. What is your AO3 profile icon, and why did you choose it?

My Ao3 icon is a picture of a pen and paper roleplaying character I rolled a few years ago. (And was drawn by @iddstar, not me, because I am Not An Artist and Vic very much is.)

After finishing this I’m dropping the rest of it beneath a readmore, because it got a teensy bit long, and I complain bitterly if these hog my own dash.)

4. Do you have any regular/favourite commenters?

You know, I feel bad talking about regular commenters, given how irregularly I actually manage to post anything these days. I feel like it’s more appropriate for me to grovel and thank those people who have stuck with me this long. (I’m particularly grateful to @ittybittymattycommittee​ because it has been A While. You’re wonderful.)

5. Is there a fanfic that you keep going back to read again and again?

I’m...I mean, there isn’t really a particular one? I have a few which I’ve read multiple times, but I tend to read the really long fics, which make regular re-reads a bit trickier. I absolutely want to go back over fics I’ve loved and enjoyed and experience that again, but it’s tricky when they take so long, and I have so little time. 

...Actually, probably my most re-read fic is a YoI one called Rumble In Detroit. It’s a goddamn masterpiece which appeals exactly to my sense of humour. (Also only 6.4k, so totally readable in one go if you’re me.)

6. How many stories are you subscribed to? How many do you have bookmarked?

I’m really bad at bookmarking. I’ll read a fic, think, “This was awesome!” and then just...forget to bookmark it and pull my hair out later wondering what the hell it was. I scroll through my history to find stuff entirely too often. I have 53 bookmarked fics, and it should be way more. 

Conversely, I am very prone to hitting that subscribe button. I have ten pages of the dratted things apparently, and okay, some of those are now completed fics, but...every now and then I get an update notification and can’t remember what the actual fic was. 

7. Which AU do you find yourself writing the most?

...I mean, angsty ones? I don’t really have a preferred setting tbh, although more often than not there is something fantastical about what I write. Generally with my fanfiction I try to mix things up a lot more than my original fic. I make a point of trying to do as many different types of story as I can. Statistically though, Apocalypse/Dystopia scenarios and (surprisingly!) Soulmate AUs work out as the most common though. 

8. How many people are subscribed and bookmarked to you in total? (you can view this on the stats page)

25 brave souls have signed up for my infrequent update notifications (bless all of you), and the stats page shows me as having 201 bookmarks. 

9. Is there something you’d like to write about but are afraid of people judging you for it? (Feeling brave? If so, share it!)

I mean, I’m pretty sure people judge me for what I already write. I’ve got fics tagged with MCD, after all, and I’m probably straying into shipping wars with at least one of my stories. I’m plenty nervous about the reaction people will have to the end of some of my fics, but I figure...ehh. I write these stories because I love them, and I share them because someone out there is bound to find them passable. 

The only thing I won’t write under this name is explicit NSFW stuff, which is because, hey, I’m hoping to get YA fiction published someday, you know? I don’t want an underage reader looking my name up (see question 1 for why they might know it) and finding something like that.

10. Is there anything you would like to be better at? Writing certain scenes or genres, replying to comments, updating better, etc.

It’s funny, because this is something I technically am better at than I used to be in years past, but the main thing is actually sitting down and writing more regularly. Despite appearances, I’ve actually written a lot of fanfic recently (Secret Santas mostly), but I could have done more than that if I’d been able to manage my time better. Also if Life hadn’t come along to mess up my day, but, hey. Go figure.

11. Do you write rarepairs or popular ships more often?

I guess it’s a bit of both? I never used to set out to write ships at all, because for me, relationships are secondary to plot when writing, but they do seem to happen more than they used to. I’m a big multishipper though so I like to mix it up.

12. How many stories have you posted on AO3 to this day (finished and unfinished)?

I have 33 works on Ao3 in total. Of those...some are oneshots, 12 are in-progress multichapter fics and...um...one is a complete multichapter fic. Whoops.

13. How many stories do you have saved in/with your writing program?

*coughs and moves on*

For real though, I posted about this recently and it’s...including original fiction, we’re talking more than thirty, possibly over 40 by now. I very deliberately don’t keep track.

14. Do you write down story ideas, or just keep them in your head?

It’s a bit of both really. Sometimes I get an idea, and it’s too fragmentary to really do anything with, so I just sorta leave it in my head to fester and ferment. If I forget it, it probably wasn’t worth saving, but if it gets to the mindworm stage I write it down in my nearest notebook at the time and expand on it a bit.

...If it’s a really fun idea, I then track down that notebook later on and copy it out onto the computer where I can actually find it again.

15. Have you ever co-authored a story?

Not for yeeeears! My sister and I started co-authoring a story back when we were teenagers, but we never actually finished the project. I really enjoyed collaborating though - it’s fun to combine forces and see what each person brings to the table!

16. How did you discover AO3?

I honestly cannot remember.

17. Do you consider yourself to be a popular or famous author in your fandom(s) on AO3?

Hahahahaha...no. It’s okay though, I’m not doing this for fame or attention. I just get these stories in my head and the only way to remove them is to write them out.

18. Do you have a nickname or fandom name for your readers?

I don’t! I...honestly can’t think of a name, tbh. Names are my nemesis, why would I add more to my life?

19. Was there an author who inspired or encouraged you to write?

WELL. 

I’ve been writing stories for as long as I can remember. Probably since I was 6 or 7 (I can remember stapling paper together at school to make a “book” to write in). Probably I was doomed from the start, but the works of Tamora Pierce, Brian Jacques, Tolkien, John Wyndham and Sir Terry Pratchett are what shaped me from my teens onward. Those are the books I read which make me want to write my own. 

20. What writing advice would you give to a beginning author?

Look, it’s really tempting I know, but don’t share online just yet. If you’re just starting out, you really are far better off keeping your work between you and trusted friends. I always look back and marvel at how damn lucky I am not to have had regular internet access until I was 18.  

You see, it meant that all my early stories - from when I was figuring out who I was as a writer, and how I wanted to write - are tucked safely away where no one can shit on them. And people do. Not everyone of course, but some, and those first few years as a writer are the most fragile.

Every author builds up a thick skin over time, because trolls are gonna troll. But it’s hard, when you work on something and do your best, and someone leaves a shitty comment about it. To my mind, the most important thing you can do as a beginner is to shield yourself from that nonsense until you’ve found your feet. There will be time yet to post your stories. Wait until you can leave it to one side for a week and come back and not despise it. (Some level of “ohgodno” is expected for your own work pretty much forever, but you should at least feel some level of pride in your work first)

...it’s hard and it’s pretty unrewarding at first, I won’t lie. But think about it like this: beginner violinists often sound awful. No one wants to hear that. But if a musician can stick it through; work past the squeaking and the cringe-worthy missed notes... What you end up with is something which can reach right into someone’s heartstrings and leave a permanent impression. 

And that is every bit worth the slog.

21. Do you plot out your stories, or do you just figure it out as you go?

A bit of both! I have at the least a rough outline (sometimes a lot more than that) for almost all my stories before starting, but I generally add to and amend it as I go. 

22. Have you ever gotten a bad comment on a story? If so, what did you do?

I think maybe once? It really wasn’t too bad though, so I just left it be. I’ve been stupidly lucky with my readers and love all of you.

23. Is there a certain type of scene that you have a hard time writing? (action, smut, etc..)

I was about to say NSFW stuff, and then I remembered confession scenes, which differ from NSFW in that I actually write those sometimes, and they take approximately five hundred times longer than literally anything else, including the smut which I hate writing so bad I practically never do it. Confession scenes are freaking hard.

24. What story(s) are you working on now?

TOO MANY. For real though, I have 3 secret santas, 3/4 active HQ fics, Hope’s Fire, and more which are sorta lurking in semi-activity beyond that. I have zero chill.

25. Do you plan your next project(s) before you finish your current ongoing story(s)?

...I mean it’d be great if I could finish an ongoing story, NGL.

26. Do you have a daily writing goal set for yourself?

Nope! I try to stick to one during NaNo, but outside that life just sorta gets in the way too often.

27. Do you think you’ve improved as a writer since you first started?

I mean, the answer is yes either way, but I tend to distinguish the various phases of my writing? age 6-12 was half-arsed writing. Just sorta jotting down stories and not really thinking too much about them. From 13-16 I was so preoccupied with writing and finishing my novel that I didn’t leave room for such trifles as quality control. 16-24/5 was slow but steady improvements. 

At 25 I realised hot damn, I have a lot to learn, and that is the point at which I consider that I started getting better for real.

28. What is your favorite story that you’ve written?

You know, it sorta depends? Assuming we’re talking fanfic only (or, sorry, but my novel beats them all), I actually...really like the Trinacrifom series? 

29. What is your least favorite story that you’ve written?

It was for a telephone prompt, it’s less than 600 words, nope, I’m not sharing it XD

30. Where do you see yourself (as a writer) in 5 years?

I mean I’d like to say something like “getting paid for it”, but we all know I’m still gonna be here writing fanfic instead of my original work.

31. What is the easiest thing about writing?

For me it’s actually the ideas! I keep getting them pop into my head.

32. What is the hardest thing about writing?

…Actually finishing things.

33. Why do you write?

At this point, writing is a little like breathing for me. It’s my identity. It’s who I am. I have so many ideas in my head and the only way to get them out is to write them, so I do. I hope that people enjoy them, certainly, and I want to think my words have an effect of some kind, but ultimately storytelling is hardwired into me and I don’t know how to stop.

Oh! Tagging. Right, after that textwall how about I pass the buck to someone else, hehe. @draculasstrawhat, @lethesomething, @iddstar and @quinnlocke as well as anyone else...if you wanna, you know? (No one’s obligated tho)

[komakitigerdrop]

A note to the readers of Grace Period is Over

My heartfelt thank you for the messages of support I have been receiving. As some of you might be aware of, my mother in law passed away in the exact day I arrived in Japan (Sep 22) and writing had to be put on hold as I arranged an emergency flight back to California to help my fiancée organize the funeral and everything else that comes with it. 

Still, here is where we stand. In the rare occasions I had some time on my own, I wrote plenty, but because I am kind of a slow writer, I am really, really behind schedule. I get the feeling things are slowly going back to normal, and that makes me somewhat optimistic about the future.

I truly appreciate your patience and constant support! ^_^

Now, about my trip to Japan, if any of you are interested.

My official travel preparations started in the beginning of this year, and originally I was going to visit Tokyo, Osaka, Sapporo and Fukuoka, stay for the Takayama Autumn Festival and spend at least one night in Yokohama because it would be fun to see the place where Kiryu Kazuma and Takaba Akihito (fandoms collide!) were born. I had booked capsule hotels and ryokans, I had already bought a shit ton of concealer to hide my tattoo when I went to the onsen, I memorised JR exceptions to the national rail pass, I signed up for Japanese lessons, I planned to visit the Yuuri! On Ice museum and even found a Karatsu deal on Japanese Groupon.

The investment was high, but I don’t put price tags on my dreams. I had been playing Yakuza for almost a decade and written for the Finder fandom for more than a year. I wanted to see the places that permeated those fictional worlds with my own two eyes.

But because life has a habit of getting off the tracks every now and then, what was supposed to be a 22-day multicity trip got trimmed to one week tops, largely due to a series of unfortunate events that ranged from credit card fraud to family crises. Our flight from Singapore to Tokyo was scheduled for September 21, but the curve balls were not over. The day before, my mother-in-law was admitted to a hospital with multiple organ failure back in California.

To cut a very long story short, I ended up flying to Tokyo on my own, and was put on a waiting list to board a flight from Narita to LAX on Saturday, September 23.

All of a sudden, my dream trip to Japan had been reduced from its original 22 days to 24… hours.

The reason why I decided to share this 24-hour journey with you all is because not only it inspired me as a writer (as you will see below, I got to be in the *real* Shinjuku, and took the train from there to Yokohama, just like I imagine Akihito has done many times in GPiO, haha), but also because… well, it’s Japan, yeah? I get the feeling others might be fascinated by this unique country as well and I for one love reading about other people’s experiences abroad.

See, the capsule hotel I had booked for my super short stay was in Asakusa, only a couple of blocks away from the Sensō-ji. When I first arrived, I was way too tired to walk around but on my second and last night in Japan I finally got around to paying the place a visit. 

The Sensō-ji Temple in Asakusa

Even though I am not a Buddhist myself, I am particularly interested in how Buddhism addresses the matter of impermanence. We are all going to die someday, and that ‘someday’ might not be that far away. It could happen anytime, to us, and to the ones we love. With the time we are given, we might as well get to know ourselves deeply, live with kindness, and learn to let go. 

The temple is stunning, and the feeling I got was that the place was inviting me to do exactly that. Look around. Feel where you are. Breathe in. Let go.

I spent a long time there, just thinking about things, mainly death. See, in my stories, I always kill at least one character that I like. Not exactly because I am a masochist, lol, but because from a very early age I have always been intrigued by death. Not so much by what happens to us when we die, but more by what happens to those that stay. Do we all grieve the same way? Is it possible to care and not grieve at all? How do people find closure?

What if they never do?

That is why pretty much everyone in GPiO has been touched by death. It’s not because I want to make them, myself or the readers suffer, but because I am fascinated by how human emotions work in the face of the one thing we can’t defeat or even understand.

But hey, back to Tokyo (what am I even doing with this post, lol. Sorry guys, as you all know I tend to ramble, a LOT).

The visit to the Sensō-ji happened the night before my departure the next morning, which means an entire day had already gone by. 24 hours in Tokyo… Hmm… I had not prepared myself for that. My “to-do” list was far too long!

I knew for a fact that I could not leave Japan without seeing Kabukicho, which is Tokyo’s number one red-light district, the real life equivalent of Yakuza’s Kamurocho, and also home to Purgatory, Tanimura Masayoshi and Maya in the beginning of GPiO.

Sadly, I was not equipped to explore the area at night. I bailed on my Japanese lessons and the area is tricky enough if you understand what is going on around you – let alone if you don’t. And so, I went during the day, and every corner is just as crazy and wonderful as I thought it would be.

Kamurocho Kabukicho during the day. 

Also, Don Quijote, man. Gotta be one of Akihito’s favorite places, so many bargains!

(But maaaan! Kabukicho at night must be a wild source of writing material…)

What else did I need to do? Obviously, walk around in Shinjuku, the ward of preference of the almighty Asami Ryuichi, and then check Yokohama as well, why not?

Shinjuku is insane. The central train station is a city under another city, and the place just. doesn’t. stop. Ever. There are always so many people coming and going all the time, even very late at night (ten, eleven, midnight). Guys leaving work, women in their skirt suits, tourists. Too bad I got lost inside the station as I looked for Pablo’s famous cheese tarts, and ended up taking, like, three hours to find my way out.

Enough time to stumble upon a Dunhill store. Woo-hoo! Look at this shoddy picture, fabulous. *drops crappy phone on trash bin*

Now, the irony. I had also planned to go to the Yuuri on Ice museum, but I was nearly one month late for the party (the exhibit in Shibuya had ended on Sep. 3). I was already back in Asakusa when I went on Tumblr, just to find out Cold Stone Creamery had partnered with YOI and was offering some exclusive merchandise, so I was hyped! I had just walked past a Cold Stone in Shinjuku!

Good thing I decided to check their website for details before jumping on yet another train. The collab would start on September 25.

Two. days. after. I left.

So, nope, no YOI for me in my fleeting 24 hours. Of course, I could have gone hunting for merchandise (both for YOI and for Finder), but again – I had bailed on my Japanese lessons so I really didn’t feel like spending my money on things I would not be able to enjoy 100%.

That being said, I did spend A LOT of money and time in Don Quijote.

I even found Maya’s favorite kit kats!

Other than that, I just happened to do a lot of people watching in trains and in Asakusa, before enjoying a few hours in my capsule hotel watching Japanese soap operas (hilarious, even when you don’t understand sh*t!), drinking sake an eating convenience store tuna rice balls.

Good times.

The next morning, it was time to go back to reality. I had a 13-hour flight ahead of me and a funeral to organize, but I was ready.

Life goes on.